On March 7^th, 2015 my sister Miriam turned 50. Whether she is halfway to 100 or has lived the life of two 25-year olds, Miriam is proof that 50 is the new 40. Miriam is a gal on the go, a leader in her community, a committed mom, a devoted wife and an exercise enthusiast and athlete. To me, she is my one and only sister and someone whom I am proud to call my sister and my friend!

When we were young, Miriam wasn’t thrilled to have me in her wake. Who could blame her, as she hardly had anytime as the star only-child, with me arriving just 17 months after her birth. However, it wasn’t my fault that there was a blackout in November 1965 and as a result, she had to share the spotlight just as she was starting to enjoy it!

We became the Freel Sisters, with matching clothes and haircuts, the same schools, the same camps, the same university… similar experiences throughout our early years- all with Miriam leading the way, 17 months ahead of me. As the younger sister, I struggled to catch-up and keep-up, especially as my sister rushed to keep ahead and distance herself from me, her little sister. I did not mean to be suffocating yet in retrospect I probably was. Hopefully Miriam can look back now and feel complimented because after all, isn’t imitation the greatest form of flattery?!

Our parallel lives continued until 1992, we were in our mid- twenties and Miriam and her husband David moved to Rothesay, New Brunswick. Until this point in our lives, we were fiercely competitive with each other, fought constantly yet also had the other’s back. I knew that if I wanted to have a relationship with my sister, an effort would have to be made. We spoke regularly on the phone, and for the last 22 years Paul and I have gone every summer to Rothesay, New Brunswick to visit with my sister and her family. Our son Jack felt such a kinship to the Maritimes, that he chose to attend Acadia University, across the Bay of Fundy from the small NB town where he spent time every summer.

Between 1993 and 1998, one of us was pregnant, taking turns, as usual, producing six cousins in five years. Our regular visits to New Brunswick, the Wells’ visits to Ottawa, Minneapolis and Toronto, and some vacations together have created a tight family unit- cousins who grew up 1500 km apart, yet are as close as they would have been in had they grown up in the same neighbourhood. My two nephews lived with us last summer, while working in Toronto at summer jobs, and they fit right into the ebb and flow of our family. Not surprisingly, Miriam and I have similar parenting styles and so Fraser and Adam knew the drill, right from the get-go. We look forward to Darcy spending more time at our home, as she starts attending Queen’s University in September.

Paul and I have moved several times over the years, and probably without knowing it, my sister has been a part of each move. When we moved to Ottawa in 1995, we were faced with a difficult decision. We had two beautiful cats, to which Miriam was hugely allergic. If I wanted Miriam and her family to ever visit us, we could not take the cats with us. Before we moved, a wonderful home was found for Fanny and Felix, and we have been cat-less ever since.

With every house we have bought, I made sure that we had a guest room for the Wells and other relatives. We looked for three years for the house we are currently in, with the showstopper on some homes being the question, “But where will my sister and her family sleep?” When we moved-in, 1½ years ago, our guestroom was fondly named, “My sister’s bedroom”. What was supposed to be a ping-pong room, was painted deep blue, and is now, “The boys’ bedroom” and is a place for our niece and nephews to crash.

It is hard to believe that fifty years have gone by, and Miriam is 50 years old (and it is my turn in 17 months)! In trying to think of how to mark this day and what to send her as a gift, I thought that a blog entry would be a good start. My gift and card are in the mail!

Miriam, thank you for being “my person”, in good times and in bad times. After Paul, you are the one that I call when I need to debrief, vent, share, brag or get advice. You are at the top of my list when I need a book or recipe recommendation and when I need a partner in the kitchen to host a family event. I know that I can count on you for anything, and for that I am extremely grateful! Thank you for being my sister!

Many happy returns on your special day! I look forward to trying to keep up with you for the next fifty years!

Some sisterly quotes I like:

“Having a sister is like having a best friend you can’t get rid of. You know whatever you do, they’ll still be there.” Amy Li

“A sister is a little bit of childhood that can never be lost.” Marion C. Garvetty

“What’s the good of news if you don’t have a sister to share it with?” Jenny DeVries

“I smile because you are my sister; I laugh because you can’t do anything about it.” Unknown

“If you don’t understand how a woman could both love her sister dearly and want to wring her neck at the same time, then you were probably an only child.” Linda Sunshine

If Miriam was in Toronto for her birthday, I would make her our family’s favourite cake…

CARROT CAKE

Cake:

4                    eggs
1½ cups         granulated sugar
1 cup              vegetable oil
2 cups            all-purpose flour
2 tsp               baking powder
1½ tsp            baking soda
½ tsp              salt
2 tsp               cinnamon
14 oz              can crushed pineapple, undrained
2 cups            grated raw carrots (about 4 large carrots)
1 cup              chopped walnuts, toasted

Icing:

½ cup             butter, softened
8 oz                regular cream cheese, softened
2 tsp               vanilla
3 1/2 cups      icing sugar, sifted

Grease and flour 13-by-9 inch baking pan. Set aside.

Cake: In large bowl, using electric mixer, beat eggs until foamy. Add sugar; beat until light and pale yellow, about 2 minutes. Gradually beat in oil.

In separate bowl, mix together flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt and cinnamon. Stir into egg mixture. Stir in pineapple, carrots and nuts.

Pour batter into prepared pan. Bake in 350F oven 45 to 50 minutes or until cake tester inserted in centre comes out clean. Run knife around edges of cake to loosen. Cool 10 minutes in pan on wire rack. Turn out of pan onto rack; cool completely.

Icing: In bowl, using electric mixer, blend butter, cream cheese and vanilla until light and smooth. Gradually beat in icing sugar; beat until smooth and spreadable. Frost cooled cake.

Makes 16 servings.